Round and Round It Goes

My Trip to Germany: Berlin

Berlin – July 10, 2006

It’s all over. I might cry, mostly because I don’t want to go home. Though I will have all the games to watch on DVD…

We heard the game was playing at Potsdamer Platz so we headed there, figuring it was in the Sony Center. Of course, it was full and closed, so we went to a nearby bar per our usual custom. We had dinner and Dunkelweiß (mmm…), then discovered the movie theater upstairs was playing the game for 3Є. Sure, the bar was free, but cush seats, A/C, ginormous screen, and new experience! It was worth 3Є.

France was awarded a PK in the 7th, which Zidane tucked away. Italy was insanely dangerous on corners, scoring on one. France turned it on in the second half (by which time I was sick to my stomach for the first time on the trip), and I thought they were going to pull it off. I hoped, anyway, as I can’t bear to cheer for Italy with all their crying and diving. Every 30 seconds Toni was on the ground, writhing and grabbing some new fake injury.

France was definitely the stronger, and Zidane, Henry, and my man Ribery put in awesome performances, but it still ended 1-1 and went to OT. Where it all fell apart. Tresuguet came in for Ribery, and Wiltford for Henry. There were cold and had no touch, didn’t know where each other were.

Zidane had his shoulder dislocated, and this is what makes him different from other players (and other Frenchmen, too): he just sat there, waiting for the whistle to blow, then when they finally noticed him, he just gave a wan smile and gestured to his dangling arm, waiting for someone to come put it back so the game could go on.

Zidane, however, was not present for the penalty shoot-out, as he received a straight red with only a few OT minutes to go for head-butting Materazzi – of f the ball – in the chest. So far, we haven’t really seen what provoked him, other than some fairly non-head-butt-worthy grabbing by Materazzi. The only thing I can figure at this point is that Materazzi jabbed him in that injured shoulder, or called his mother a really bad name (as it turned out, he called his mother AND sister really bad names).

So shoot-out without Henry, Zidane, and Ribery. On the second shot, Trezuguet bounced it off the crossbar, but unlike Zidane’s PK in the 7th, this shot did NOT bounce down over the line. This would be the end for France, as Italy nailed all 5 of their PKs.

I was sick that the whiners and divers had won, but also increasingly sick to my stomach, period. Even J, after cheering for Italy, admitted they didn’t deserve the Cup. We didn’t stay to see them crowned, though we did see the Italian national team cut off Camoranesi’s nasty hair-knob in some ritual of victory.

Back to the hotel for some 1-on-1 time with the flush valve. I’m impressed I made it this far into the trip without getting to know a random toilet intimately. It’s a record, I believe.

Berlin – Later…

Today we gave over all decision-making to Jeff, our tour guide at Fat Tire Bike Tours
(affiliated with Mike’s in Munich).

The tour started in Alexanderplatz, and toured a lot of East Berlin, which we hadn’t seen much of previously.

• Marienkirche and the TV Tower. The TV tower arose as an East Berlin structure. West Berlin had built a tower, and East Berlin felt the need for a bigger and better one – but they didn’t have the knowledge or technology. So they hired the Swedes (snuck them in and out, really), only later to discover that when the sun reflected off the giant disco ball, it sent of rays of light in the form of a cross. West Berlin called it “the Pope’s Revenge.” Only the T-Mobile stick-on soccer ball decal was able to cover it up.
  
  (© hermitthecrab 2006)
  
  
• Neptune’s Fountain
  
  (J's pic)
  
  
• After passing the Rotes Rathaus, the East Berlin Town Hall, we came to Marx-Engels Platz (the framers of The Communist Manifesto), and sat in Uncle Karl’s lap.
  
  Don't cry for these Argentinians (J's pic)
  
  
• Bebelplatz, the site of the infamous Nazi book-burnings, but also home to Humboldt University, where Einstein and the Grimm brothers studied (not at the same time, of course), the opera house, Hedwig’s Cathedral (a replica of the Pantheon), and currently the Buddy Bears. Turns out those are nothing more than a traveling exhibit; the U.N. called out to artists to paint them however they wanted, and around the world the bears go. Our Aussie ass man (the guy stuck at the back to round up stragglers) said they’d been in Sydney for 3 months. Mystery solved.

Another mystery solved is that of the Walk/Don’t Walk guys. The ones with hats were East German, and disappeared post-reunification. As a gesture of sentiment, Berlin brought them back, but mixed East and West all over the city.

Humboldt University and the Buddy Bears (© hermitthecrab 2006)

• The balcony from which Kaiser-Wilhelm declared WW1. Eh.
  
• I hadn’t quite realized before that Germany got so egregiously split up among the Allies after WW2. Jeff drew us a lovely chalk map to illustrate:
  
  J is balancing in Berlin (© hermitthecrab 2006)
  
  
• The “Deathstrip,” the area between the two walls that formed THE wall, where snipers were free to kill anything that moved.
  
  (© hermitthecrab 2006)
  
  
• The last remaining sniper tower. Something like 5000 people escaped to the West from East Berlin, but 700 died, including one man who was killed two days before the wall came down.

And come down it did. The full story is that in 1989, Hungary opened its borders with Austria, creating a huge hole in the Iron Curtain. East Germans could go to Hungary, then to Austria, West Berlin, and West Germany as a result. The East German/Russian government decided to fight this by granting travel visas to East Germans could see how “truly horrible” the western world was, and subsequently come running back to the loving arms of the Communists.

They called a live press conference, handed the spokesman a bunch of notecards and let it go from there. But the only info the spokesman had was that travel visas were to be offered…when asked when and to whom, he floundered and responded “Immediately, to everyone.” East Berliners flooded the checkpoints by the thousands within minutes. Having no orders, the soldiers held them for a while, but finally just let them through. And the Communists’ game was up.

• The huge Coke billboard at Potsdamer Platz, which has already been altered to reflect Germany’s hopes for 2010.
  
  (© hermitthecrab 2006)
  
  
• Hitler’s bunker, where he and Eva Braun hid out, got married, and killed themselves. It’s a parking lot now for a fancy apartment complex, though the 18-room bunker lies below as the Russians were unable to blow it to smithereens despite their whole-hearted attempts.
  
  (© hermitthecrab 2006)
  

Time for beer and more beer. We traveled through the Tiergarten to the biergarten, making friends with father and son D & S from New Jersey. They were in Berlin for the whole cup, and S is moving on to Munich & Austria tomorrow.


The Tiergarten biergarten, and yet another ginormous bike lock (© hermitthecrab 2006)


More friends (J's pic)

We each drank a dunkelweiß and shared a radler (hey, it was hot out there), so the ride back was a bit tricky. Made even moreso by the sun – we forgot sunscreen, so now have lovely burns from our very last day in the country.

Wobbling a bit, we cruised on the Spree River, spotting the National Chancellery, where the Chancellor usually resides, though the current Chancellor Angela Merkel does not. Over a nice bridge, past the Hauptbahnhof and the ginormous soccer cleats fronting the Swiss Embassy, and around to the Reichstag.


The German Chancellory on the Spree River – and some crazy boaters who must want a bacterial disease (© hermitthecrab 2006)

Our last stop was at the Berliner Dom, a lovely Protestant church, and the Altes Museum, full of old junk.


The Berliner Dom, the Altes Museum, and a random sapling (© hermitthecrab 2006)

We got T-shirts, a coupon for Barcelona, and 50¢ Pilsners from the tour shop before we headed on our way, buzzed and sunburned.

In search of the Michael Ballack calendar that so amused us in Bad Homburg, we caught a train to the shops we knew near the Zoologischer station. Of course, we found the calendar in a newsstand in the station before ever boarding a train, but had forgotten our original purpose (um, beers), so got on the train anyway.

We wandered back through the Kaiser-Wilhelm Gedachtniskirche to the KaDeWe, a ginormous department store. About the only things interesting there, besides its sheer size, were the prominently displayed seasons 1 and 2 of Baywatch on DVD (in German, of course) – gotta have the Hoff! – and all the WC toys they had. Action figures of the players (with kicking motion!), 3-D puzzles of the players, the balls, etc., stuffed animals, coins, just about anything they could make a buck off. It distracted drunk-us for about 15 minutes.


Berlin's just crazy about Walk/Don't Walk signals (© hermitthecrab 2006)


The Ka De We, the largest department store ever (J's pic)


Who needs a guidebook when you've got manhole covers? (© hermitthecrab 2006)

At this point, it was nap time for J, as usual, so back to the hotel.


The daily nap (© hermitthecrab 2006)

Dinner – a revisit to the House of 100 Beers for the best apple strudel ever, and the funniest beer I’ve had, a nearly clear radler served in a Guinness glass. Ah, the irony.


That is so not Guinness (J's pic)

Pack, then airport in the morning. I’m not at all ready to go.


Can I please stay in Germany? Please??? (© hermitthecrab 2006)

The End!!! (Finally...)

posted by Lyle Skains @ 11:51 AM